Doors to My Inner Child

ArtEZ University of the Arts

2022

The installation was composed of 4 arched doorways that get shorter in size as a person passes by, a child (an inner child) is shorter in height, and so are the last doors, they are a metaphor for the psychological doors one enters to access their inner child.

The three lights: red, green and blue, when pointed towards the centre point trick our eyes into seeing white light, this is called additive mixture, when all three lights are added it triggers the three cones of our eyes creating the sensation of seeing white. However, the shadows created by these lights are not dark but a combination of the two colours when the third is being blocked, for example, block the red and green lights and you get a blue shadow. The lights in this installation are a metaphor for the inner shadow aspects we carry and are afraid to see, by playing with light the message I tell is that shadows are not as unkind as one might think.

At the end of the walk through the doors, we reach the wall on the back where the person’s body blocks all three lights, creating a dark shadow. The last door is also the smallest one, the person is then obliged to bow, it is a moment to bow to our inner child and to see it as a colourful shadow.

What inspired me

Hoʻoponopono Mantra

Hoʻoponopono is a traditional Hawaiian practice of reconciliation and forgiveness. The Hawaiian word translates into English simply as correction, with the synonyms manage or supervise.

I am sorry

Please forgive me

Thank you

I love you

“I am sorry”, for me it comes from the realisation that I am responsible for everything that is in my mind, I then feel sorry for all the suffering I caused myself.

“Please forgive me”, it is an act of reconciliation with myself or another.

“Thank you”, it is to be grateful for the knowing of who I am.

“I love you”, it is to let love move through my body, a deep feeling of unconditional love.

Book Arrow to the Sun by Gerald McDermott

Arrow to the Sun is a children’s book we’ve had for years in our house, it tells the tale story pertaining to a Native American pueblo, the Acoma Pueblo. In the book, a boy seeking his father finds an arrow maker, who turns him into an arrow and shoots him to the sun, where he finds his father. His father challenges him to prove himself by going through the four chambers of ceremony, after going through the Kiva of Lions, the Kiva of Serpents, the Kiva of Bees and finally, the Kiva of Lightning, the boy is ready and returns to the pueblo to bring the message of his father.

For me this book brings me the number 4 and the idea of a ritual involving 4 parts, in my case, 4 doorways.